Delhi does have a nightlife that’s young, pretty sparkling and happening (i’m assuming that this is the half of Delhites that you don’t see on the streets because they don’t spend much time on them but above them in offices). Sandeep took me out on the town to Shalom Lounge and Urban Pind. Both were hotspots & my type of place that were as hip, with a sensual yet classy appeal, spinning my kind of vibes… very happening and where the beautiful people go. As per my review on Urban Pind on tripadvisor.com:

“Finally, a nightclub that redeems the notion of a nightlife in Delhi!”
Loved this restaurant/bar- from the moment you enter the door, see the handsome host dressed in a white suit and catch the perfumed scent of orange in the air, you feel like you’ve found the spa resort of Delhi bars! The music is pumping but not deafening and there is an air of class, culture and urban hip to give you the illusion that Delhi has been delivered into the 21st century of cool. The faux Khujurao sculptures add to subtle, sexy undertones to the dimmed atmosphere, while rooftop bar lends itself to open conversations, fun mingling and crowd watching. The Indian spiced drink (they could use a larger menu of these kinds of mixed drinks) was a little on the heavy side but nonetheless, a wonderful signature touch of its own.

Fri, Oct 10: Delhi

Today I got up late and am awoken by Dev at Shahi Palace in Jaisalmer who is calling to check in and see how my trip was going Post-Tour-Scam experience! This means that my India Vodaphone SIM finally works again… a little late but better than never! My flight leaves at an odd red-eye hour of 1:15A tomorrow morn and my hotel is allowing me a late checkout.
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Last breaths:
This may be my last day in India and its been hard to decipher whether I want to extend my stay and continue on. I want to experience more and find more redeeming qualities about it. But the fatigue of constantly scrambling to find my bearings is getting to me. Its not easy to travel solo 24/7 with last minute preparations & my annoyance is primarily a wish that I planned for myself better! Right now, I seek an oasis of calm, “a moment” of beauty and a bit of spoiled privilege to rejuvenate myself. None offers itself within the Delhi madhouse of honking horns, zig-zag driving, near death collisions, dirt, bugs, haggling, outdoor urinals and the constant visibility of poverty.
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Everything is a Negotiation
As a tourist, most of the time you’re uncertain of whether a smile means you’ve just been scammed or if someone is going to ask you for rupees for it! Places with ‘fixed prices’ are a godsend because if nothing else, its a honest foundation to base your dealings upon vs that constant feeling that no matter how earnestly you haggle, you’re bound to be a victim of a hiked up tourist price!

Haggling for my Taxi:
There is no “ART” or playfulness to my method of haggling a taxi. I simply- ASK a local what the going-rate is for my destination before hailing the auto!

Armed with my new Indian vocabulary…
1- the“swivel-bob” action with your head that looks like you’re saying NO but means “Yeah, sure why not?” and
2 – what I personally call “Chalo! hands” (a “Go” or “Go away” flicking of a hand as if shooing away flies or as if saying “There’s no more left”)

I have two points to my closed negotiation with taxi drivers:
1) I state the rate i’ve been given by a local upfront OR
2) I tell the taxi driver I want to use the meter! (something most want to avoid )
….

Last day for gift-getting is a scramble & i’ve done nowhere NEAR the amount of shopping as I hear M&D are doing on this trip…

Chandni Chowk (or Moonlit Avenue) is a congested and historic marketplace of in the heart of Old Delhi with dilapidated havelis and small, winding streets and souks crowded with worker traffic, pedestrians and merchants specializing in a specific commodities.

Saris! Saris! Saris! spices, jewelry, books, grains, sweets,… you name it (I got my dad a kurta and dhoti here). Here, the traffic of people, workers & rickshaws is a swarm as it is everywhere else in India, and while there are a handful of famous neighboring tourist landmarks, what makes CC the mother of Delhi markets and bazaars is what I call, “THE HUMAN PLOW”!

Firstly, the cargos of product or produce are transported via 1) being strapped on the top of one’s head or 2) via “pullcart wagon” with one man up front pulling, followed by two men behind pushing! Secondly, these cargo loads are LARGE & seemingly BEYOND NORMAL HUMAN CAPACITY and these men DO NOT make it look easy! Their sweat pours physical strain and uneasy facial winces.

Cows are considered sacred in India, so it’s a bold sight to see men doing the mule work, strapped to the yoke as the cows lazily look on. I’ve an immediate respect for The Human Plow. IT IS WHAT IT IS in extreme manual labor and a hard day of honest work! And despite the discomfort and the strain of their work, most of these hard-working men will make the time and energy amidst their work to lend a smile to my camera. These men love the attention of having their picture taken & why shouldn’t they?…What they do is phenomenal.

Like worker bees and ants- each man is necessary to literally, pushing the great wheel of daily commerce- his insignficance and greatness of his destiny is enslaved to arduous manual labor and the daily contract of…a few rupees!
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Street Food
I’ve been progressively bolder about eating foods from local shop vendors . Today I pull out all stops. I admit, a part of me foolishly believes that i’ve NOT experienced TRUE IN-D-I-A until i’ve experienced Delhi-Belly, so I go crazy with sampling those foods off the streets sold in “the newspaper envelopes and banana leaf bowls”! Street food is a common & inexpensive fast food restaurant substitute …but without a roof! A chai stand could lend a table & bench for people to “sit & sip” or it may consist of only one person, squatting on a mat while brewing cups for willing squatters. Food vendors sell a range of things- chaat (like Indian Chex Mix or mixed plates & you choose the mixings), puris, samosas, jalebis (a deep-fried breakfast pretzel soaked in sweet syrup), curries, etc… Anywhere nearby is ‘squat or stand’ real estate for patrons taking their meal-on-the-go.

The cups, packages and bowls that hold street food is a novelty! No plastic knifes, forks or paper plates – everything is biogradeable trash. Small packages holding samosas and burfis, etc… are made from newspaper, while bowls are constructed from banana leaves. In Bhaktapur, Nepal, one chaat vendor had made scoops from folded paper and cups were made from composition book pages containing someone’s homework on it. Crazy. I love this way of creative resourcefulness!

Thurs, Oct 9:Delhi

I’ve hired a driver for a day to sightsee Delhi. For 700Rs (a little over $10 and equal to a OW cab trip from Soho to my apt in Hell’s Kitchen ) this is a bargain! Both Sandeep and Regina have arranged to join me. Sandeep was generous to offer the use of his car for this, but I had booked my car in advance, so I’ve asked him to tag along instead. Also, it’s Regina’s last day to sightsee Delhi and she wanted to see things as well.

Tourist sights: Lotus Temple, Hanumayun’s Tomb & Quatab Minar (both to drop R off), the government sector full of government building & the port of India & the Red Fort.

I LOVE that i’m here during festival time- today is the holiday of Dusshera (“Victory Day”)! All week I try my best to follow the festivals from Nepal’s Dushain to Varanasi’s celebration of Durga Puja and now to Delhi.

(Durga floats on their way to Yamuna River for their releasing)

(Makahna seller outside of a Shiva temple)

(Dussehra festival near the Red Fort in Delhi)

Regina & Sandeep in front of giant Ramlila dolls that will be burnt as part of the festivities

Today is the apex of the festivals- an overlap of celebrations. Durga Puja floats will be set into the river to kick off Dasara while giant tower-sized of dolls Ravana will be set on fire in effigy for Dusshera in memorial of good triumphing over evil. The festival excitement, is of that of a football tailgate party and you can witness it at carnivals, on the freeways as truckloads of people are shouting and jeering, faces painted with the red paint of Holi, as they take the floats to their releasing in the Yamuna River!

According to Sandeep and my driver, the hotel I had booked in Manju-ka-Tilla (a Tibetan colony up north near the sacred Yamuna River) is “not in a good area and is far from Central Delhi” & though I had booked it to be near the festivities, I doubt myself and scramble to find a hotel in a more convenient and safer location. My Vodaphone SIM card is still not working and it’s hard not having a phone in India and its a standard form of communication. Without it, I’m forced to hit the streets in search of STD booths (aka calling booths!). While calling within India is relatively cheap however- 1rupee a minute or free if you’re calling a local number from a landline- I am thankful to Sandeep for offering his mobile phone. I promptly called hotels in or near Connaught Place (its a huge mall) and had my driver take us there to check them out.

I’ve always stayed at mid-range and higher hotels. My stars, while they curse me in other areas, endorse me w/ a healthy portion of luxury glamorousnesses in my career & life so that I don’t need to be mega-rich to enjoy the privileges of a 5-star resort! Thus, I can deliberately toe-dip on the side of dirty bedsheets, guest houses and budget hotels, knowing its not my curse in life! Afterall, i’m in India!!! How many everyday local people and lifestyle am I going to see and experience at an expensive HOTEL other than the local people working there? And how many of those kinds of hotels are going to let their employees sleep on a blanket in the lobby after all is closed down?…

(some employees sleep on the rooftop of their workplaces too)

The budget-guesthouses to low mid-range hotels have been pretty consistent throughout. They run roughly $6-20/night and if the sheets or towels don’t look dirty, then they’ll charge you for toilet paper or the pillows will tempt smells of someone’s “man” head (as i imagine ALL of India- and its predominant population of men- passes through!) Also, while the bathrooms have- to my relief- a western toilet, it also comes with an ugly version of a handicapped shower stall w/ lukewarm water, a floor drain and what I haven’t enough curiousity to figure out the need for in a large plastic tub and pouring cup. (I’m part Japanese, so I know what one of them is for…as for the cup, i’ve used to pour water to flush the toilet if it hasn’t worked).

Wednesday, October 8: Delhi

Back in Delhi. This second time around (post scam tour), I am CONVINCED I will make it better!

First stop: Tourist Freak Shows- It is Regina’s birthday and Regina’s Indian friends, Ramina and Reena hosting a lunch in celebration and our travel squad has been invited. I am excited! A trip to a foreign country doesn’t have much bearing if you’re always seeing things from a tourist’s perspective. Often, you’re trying to acclimate yourself to the differences in cultures, climates and lifestyles. You have to take a picture of EVERY oddity that is not in your cultural vocabulary. EVERYTHING is a novelty or an untrained circus act to you. ie… I saved my MacDonald‘s wrapper because it said “Paneer Salsa Wrap” (its the equivalent of a vegetarian breakfast burrito but with potatoes!) Retarded stuff like that, you know? I was even taking pictures of my food for a while, until I realized- Hey, unless there’s a lamb’s head (god forbid) propped up by a stake or wiggly things on my plate, then I can probably get this shot at any Indian restaurant in NYC! But being new to this culture, it’s hard to find the cut-off point between shooting “novelty freak & sideshow acts” vs “worthwhile memories” accurate to experiencing a true India.

Applying for Visa-like SIMs: I met R at the Vonnage store in Connaught Place. We needed to report that the SIM cards Regina had purchased for us were NOT working and we’ve been without use of our phones since. The store gave us the run-around & it’s true that anything dealing with the purchase of SIM’s in India is a real hassle & more strenuous than applying for a Visa! Proof of residence or hotel stay (a written letter on letterhead stating exact dates of stay) IS REQUIRED. This is difficult for a traveler that plans from day-to-day. But Regina wisely brought her Hawaii driver’s license for proof! Hah! After straightened out confusions, we were off to the metro and the district of Dwarka, a serene residential sector in Delhi with clean town houses, apartment complexes with not a visible stain of poverty!

Finding your way can be hard: The auto-rickshaw driver may NEED to ask SEVERAL people along the way for directions or may “choose” NOT to pick you up if you’re not going to an area he doesn’t feel like. I had a rickshaw driver who took all of 15 min + several neighborhood inquiries to drive to a place which was located 5 min on a direct semi circle of the same street. A cheap and efficient alternative is the new Delhi metro- you’ll save time, money and haggle energy! The metro system is still new and its surprising to see a different life exists on it. The facilities are clean, people are better dressed and overall, the environment is degrees cleaner (yet still predominantly male)! There is NO eating or drinking on the metro and at approx. 19Rs (a little under 25 cents!) it’s cheaper than a cab or rickshaw.

Indian Hospitality & New friends : Lunch at Reena & Ramina’s apartment in Dwarka was wonderful! Our hosts made a delicious rice biryani, daal, chicken curry, veggies, dessert, etc… It was a large spread to feed us all- Regina and a bunch of strangers they’ve not met before. This was Indian hospitality! While Team M&D had to rush to jump on the itinerary again, Regina and I stayed for a longer chillax time with the sisters. Nearing their 30′s, the sisters Reena & Ramina come from a class of Modern Delhites. Dressed leisurely in tank tops and shorts, they are both, beautiful, single, working career gals on their day off, with very warm and earthy demeanors. And damn- can they cook!… Hailing from Manipur (where Regina thinks we might be able to pass ourselves off as being from in order to blend in, as the features we hear lend toward an Asian-Pacific Island look), the sisters have made their home and careers in Delhi- one in advertising and the other in non-profit, conservational wildlife. The girls are genuinely chill people.

Lights Off Rock-n-Rolla : With our new friends, Ramina & Reena and my new Delhi Facebook friend, Sandeep (whom I met that eve) we were at Cafe Morrison, a hip rock-n-roll bar in Greater Kailash, south Delhi. Sandeep, in his 20′s, is born and raised in an affluent Delhi family and took his college schooling in the States. He is jovial and fun and immediately I know I will like him as a friend. Rock-n-Roll bars are a funny thing to me and even funnier when it’s a rock-n-roll bar in India. All of it is rock-n-roll America, music, dancing, drinks, bar food … NO India. (This feels odd when you know you’re in INDIA). The young Indian hipsters come out from the crack in ceiling and remindi you that Delhi is capable of being modern.

Delhi shuts down at around 12A and Sandeep, a true gentleman, kindly offered to drive me back to my hotel in dreadful Paharghanj. He knew it was unsafe for me as a female & I felt unsafe returning at this late an hour! We waited for Birthday Girl, Regina to hop her cab to the Sheraton & were off! While Sandeep had lived in Delhi most of his life, places like Paharganj were far removed from his vocabulary. So we had to stop occasionally to ask for directions on how to get there. India– the poor can’t get out and the rich have to ask directions as to how to get in!

Most of the hours I’ve seen Paharghanj, it’s been bustling with human traffic, so I wasn’t expecting there to be a CURFEW. To my surprise, after 12A- all was pitch black and sleeping!!! Most of the small streets & alleys were as dark as they were nameless. There were no streetlights and everything was deserted except the outdoor bed cots speckled with employees of establishments. I was thankful for Sandeep. There was NO WAY I would have found my hotel in any safe manner and I definitely, would NOT have found a cab or rickshaw driver to take me through those streets at this late an hour! When we finally found my $12/nite budget hotel Cozy Inn located in a winding alley, Sandeep escorted me in and knocked on the glass door for one of the hotel employees to open up. Upon hearing the knock, one of the hotel employees unrolled himself from his blanket on the lobby floor and wearily got up to unlock the door to let me in.

Goodnight!

Tuesday, Oct 7: Delhi

As terrifying and dangerous as it can be to be “a first time solo female traveler” traveling through developing countries, there are also a great advantages I’m experiencing.

The first – No remote controls or glass windows. Unlike traveling solo for work, I don’t have: a GPS, Hertz rental car, 4-5 star hotel with meal stipends, a support office back home working 24/7 that I can ring up when something goes awry… No. None of that. When you don’t have a pampering support structure, what do you do? You are forced to interact with people and are no longer an observer or passive participant of your travels. You’re almost reliant upon strangers as you are vulnerable and you must with great caution, distinguish between TRUSTWORTHY advice and lies. And while you try your best to be on your toes about things, there’s a huge language barrier & “trust” in strangers you have no choice but surrender to. This makes you vulnerable to being fucked with!

One rickshaw driver (yeah, this is his scrawny chicken leg…) in Varanasi dropped me far from my hotel because I haggled him down to the “local price” vs. the “tourist’s” & he was not happy with that. My traveler intuition told me that “something felt wrong” but being foreign to the mass of crazy alley-streets w/ no signs, how was I supposed to be certain? So I did in my mind the wisest and ONLY thing I could do to ensure justice on some level- before handing him my money, I said “If this is not the right place and you cheat me, then this is …Karma!”

The driver nodded agreement, I paid him & he went off on his way, leaving me in Fuck-you, Goodbye-land! Sometimes, you take a risk and make mistakes – this only enforces the learning of what your environment and the “local way” can truly be about!

Secondly- you must survive by your own RESOURCEFULNESS while holding COMPASSION in your wallet. Most travelers and soloists are in the same backpacking boat as you, feeling equally naked, equally “budget-minded” and… equally excited to chatter about adventures and observations of the foreign-ness they’re experiencing! Some travelers aid you in the passing of time, offer insights and advice to the cultural ways or are there to momentarily conspire with you in “The Art of Stretching your Rupee” (ie. Lee from China).

You meet travelers from every part of the world and most of the backpacking/traveler types come from differing economies and longer days of travels. The gift you learn is compassion, sensitivity and open-mindedness, that not everyone sees the way you do or has a spending budget such as yours. With Lee, she was doing most of her travels via local bus or train because a $100 flight while allowing for more time to sightsee a city, was way TOO expensive. She even passed on a 100Rs (roughly $2USD) boat ride on the Ganges, even though it was something she wanted to do and I offered to split the cost with her (I didn’t mind taking it again). Sometimes you forget that what is “CHEAP” for you is “not cheap ” for others, even when they’re your peers… You learn to watch your expensive tongue and be respectful of the fact, Hey- wake up, ALL PEOPLE aren’t YOU!

Thirdly- you discover the world, while round, is also VERY small. When meeting people on the road, you inevitably trip upon those No-Way! coincidences and ironies. On my last day in Varanasi I tripped upon a 6’4″ gawk-ward boheme and artsy Frenchboy, Dorian! I told him how I fell in love with this little town in Southern France, Die, that I spent a month ine & he exclaimed in an exuberant scribbly French accent “Die! Mon Dieu- what a coincidence…that’s where I’m from!”

Fourth- Kind hearts. There’s a reassurance that you are not alone and that there are angels watching over you (sometimes, in the form of other travelers.) Traveling solo and being female, I find people admire my strength of spirit and are more compassionate and protective for my well-being and safety than they would be others. Tonight, arriving back in Delhi, I spent time with an older couple. Doran, a quiet Israeli scientist was traveling with his wife through India after having attended a conference in Hyderbad. I was bonding with his wife through our observations of poverty in the Varanasi homes & talk of experiencing Rishikesh (they were going there next), when I noticed over her shoulder that Doran, like myself was a hobby photographer with a wonderful and amazing compositional eye for capturing irony. When I reached Delhi, the couple extended a potential meetup invitation in Rishikesh and a contact number should I get into a tight spot in my travels. In such a short time, this couple had built a firm memory in my heart.

Doran & his wife introduced me to a young Israeli girl who was traveling alone. The Israeli girl asked if I wanted to share an airport cab w/ herself and Marianne. Marianne was a French female traveler whom the Israeli met on the plane also…(you see where I’m going with this “you pick people up along the way” backpacking/traveler mentality)! When it was discovered that we were all going to the Paharganj area, it felt like my devotion to the Hindu god Ganesh was paying off in lucky travel coincidences!

On the Road at last …in the spirit of Jack Keroac
I suggested taking a pre-paid airport taxi- a 175 Rs cab ride was roughly a $4 fare and divided 3 ways, it cost us each about $1 per person! The girls were holding out for a cab that cost even LESS, but they finally realized this was the cheapest quote. Riding from the airport to the Paharghanj area with these ladies worked out great! The cab was alive with regaling travel stories of “Why solo travel is the best way to experience a place, its culture and people!” Everything is on your own terms when you travel alone- NO COMPROMISES and you get to do what YOU want to do without wasting time on the (as Marianne puts it) “touristy crap”. My new alliances were obviously NOT of the touristy crap sort and it was ludicrous for them to think of paying for their experiences (hence, I DID NOT- repeat- DID NOT reveal that I foolishly paid money for a tour let alone that it was a scam!)

Since my art days, I had always romanticized being a traveler vs. a tourist. I like my experiences rooted deep, free, natural and a bit accidental vs. paying for expensive “used shoes“. The Frenchie and the Israeli had a similar bohemian Jack Keroac mind towards “The Art of Traveling“. They wanted to experience the freedom of their travels by living off the land and… for free (or close to it)! Afterall, as Marianne put it “Why pay a tour where they have a someone show me ‘What India is’, when I can meet fellow travelers & locals with whom I can discover and create my own experiences of India ?” This is true.

Paul Bowles, Jack Keroac, Larry Rivers, all writers, poets and bohemes of the beat culture know that you go where the road takes you and you take what it gives you. Until this trip (& traveling with a tourist team like M&D), most of my travels have been a bit like this- I’m not “a Planner” or “an Itinerary Survivalist” ! I’m used to traveling with extremely creative artists or tv production crews with a similar agendas and who covet their alone/creative time as well. Majority of my experiences are natural and mostly “accidental” but I trust the element of surprise. In the end, they become “experiences” which take me levels deeeper and are 10x more fulfilling than any tour could plan.

If I didn’t want to experience India- dirty bedsheets, piss-poverty-n-all (& by all means, not saying this is ALL there is to India, but just the forefront of my reactions), then I am best off watching it TV where there are no smells and no extremes suffered. My life is one long luxury vacation compared to my experiences here but the very reason I travel is to NOT experience MY LIFE.

So suck it up! I’m back in Paharganj, staying at $12/night dirty-looking bedsheets #2, Raj’s Cozy Inn Hotel! (and secretly still having a both, grand and terrified time!)

Sept 27, 2008

2 days ago back in Jaisalmer, I stayed with Regina at my original reservation Shahi Palace , while M&D stayed at the tour’s hotel.

In the evening, as we got to know the Mali brothers/family that owns the hotel and they tipped us off as to HOW MUCH our “tour “ is ripping us off in costs, squeezing 3ppl to a room, 4ppl to a car, how every shop/rest-stop is our driver’s commission. As they put it, if we gave saddhu just 1/10 of what we’re paying for on this trip, the saddhu and his entire family would pray for us for the rest of his life! I knew our tour was a scam, but local insight surfaced more injustice. Now I knew why my intuition gravitated to Shahi.

Early off, I had felt I compromised my trip for group harmony. This was my 2nd chance to change my directional bullshit to make this trip the one I’d always dreamed of. I wanted OFF – no “ifs”, “buts” or “maybes”! M&D agreed to fight to get their money back with me.

Long story short, standing for principle always wins even when it loses. 20 min before we met with the tour agency in Delhi and 3 hours before our flight to Nepal, Dan went pink with panic raving- we all signed a contract!we all signed a contract! (Now, I don’t remember signing a contract- but I had also relegated myself to Deaf, Dumb & Numb to ease my pain). Then he said I should pool together with him and Margaret,

… to get an upgraded tour! ”. Yecccchhh!!! The last thing I wanted was to do more touristy shit where I met NO locals that I didn’t pay to meet. I didn’t buckle and he said “Me & Margaret are fine with staying on the tour ! If you want to try to get a refund, we can part ways here and you can negotiate it on your own”. (echoes of pre-trip & Regina tell me this was inevitable…unfortunate, but inevitable)

Like that, the marriage of Team M&D was consumated and I became a FIRST TIME SOLO TRAVELER (well, in a developing country that is)!

5 minutes into our meeting with the tour agent, Team M&D caved in without a fight. I stood NYC resolute towards TOUR TERMINATION and a REFUND. I’m a big gambler of ALL or NOTHINGS – I ruined my trip with a $500 knife, I wasn’t about to give in to an upgrade for a machette.

Monday, Sept 23, 2008: Delhi

Today was our first day-day in delhi and we disappointingly didn’t do or see much.

Day #2… still healthy, excited, hesitant…disturbed.
Its my believe that the 2nd day after your arrival usually sets the note of the trip and there’s an uncomfortable energy surrounding today. Regina left early to go off Agra so now our balanced group of 4 collapses into a threesome. The breakfast buffet at the Grand Godwin Hotel was outstanding! Their rooftop restaurant had so many food options to choose from. It’s a small comfort to numb my shock of the bathroom in this hotel. There’s no separation between shower, sink or toilet and one drain lets you know that any splash goes to the same place. Also, there’s a large bucket w/ a small bucket inside it next to the shower. You do the math.

My cellphone/WIFI still doesn’t work in this hotel. Not sure if its the hotel or my cellphone but the next place we stay at I will try again.

Pahar Ghanj leaves a lot to be desired. My first impression on entering PG was “What the hell?…Our hotel isn’t HERE, is it?” In the little area of markets, small dirt streets decorated with trash, an over-population of staring men, cramped hotels, food vendors and crazy honking traffic.. a regurtitated childhood memory surfaces of my very first experience of shabby conditions during an  vacation. A hotel room in San Francisco’s Chinatown in the early 80s…ugh. Basic, run-down, I remember not being able to drink the water and the streets outside were noisy bustling, dirty cramped! While some memories leave an indelible stain during youth, newer memories come in to eventually take the prize. Paharghanj is definitely now taking the prize.

Male to female ratio:
I just had a “brisk” walk through our neighborhood which was between a stroll and a jog!…at NYC pace! Sightseeing PG at night is like this is like wolfing your food down at a restaurant that you actually want to observe longer. But this is because there’s a male/female ratio that for once has women at an advantage but not this woman. Lots of men….not your light-skinned Bollywood-babe type but obviously the kind that blends in with the dark and looks scroungy. I see very few women on the streets here. For every 20 men, there must be 1 woman. In India, women and their lives don’t appear to have much visibility here… or at least NOT in Paharghanj. At my hotel, everyone from the cook to the maids (errr…room cleaners) and receptionists are ALL MEN. Outside, the marketplace shoppers, shopowners, waiters, etc… MEN.

Touristing and Breaking Contracts of Relationships:
I started off wanting to take a Delhi walking tour given by a children’s community center that Regina had told me started near the New Delhi Station (an 8min walk from our hotel). En route, Margaret and Dan got distracted by a cabbie wanting to take us to the India Tourist Center. Not sure why M&D wanted to follow him, but 2 outnumbers 3. We were taken to “A” tourist center tucked away in the shabby surroundings of an alley in Connaught Place and basically were sold another version (the very same) of the trip itinerary that M and I had labored over to create! It DIDN’T make sense to spend the money on something we already had but I knew Dan preferred the safety and cleanliness of a more white-washed India to authentically “roughing it” or hanging out with locals. Due to my pre-trip fallout with M, I wasn’t about to quarrel, be the bad guy or be made to feel “the cheap one”. So rather than fight it- I agreed.

The cost of being a tourist
The tour cost $518 – a HELL LOT MORE than I expected to be spending for India or what I KNOW we can get by on. And tho I hate being on “touristy tours”, like those monkeys (see no evil, hear no evil...) i’m trying my best to be DEAF, DUMB, BLIND and NUMB! (Mom- you’ll be glad to know there’s no “off-the-beaten track” capabilities for me to get into trouble as there’s little freedom from this itinerary) In a simple summary, it’s about $35/day on this tour but we also visit 1-2 additional cities, which is the advantage they sold us. The 2nd selling point was NOT having to use public transportation , which M & D liked but I was disappointed by.

With this tour, we have to break our reservation with the only hotel that I feel we’ve built relations with, Shahi Palace Hotel (a haveli in Jasailmer)! M & I initially planned a cheaper trip where we “experience” more vs “see”, but in this version, we get a driver, “Kul”, who takes the three of us around in a SMALL AC Tata car (Tata‘s are a very popular vehicle brand in India). This is supposedly to our advantage in time and luxury. I’m not sure how much luxury it will be when R joins us and we’re FOUR squeezed into a tiny AC car!

Kul seems nice, speaks good english and is knowledgeable. He is Sikh.. the guys with the turbans and facial hair. We think he must be around our age, but we have to imagine him without the beard.

From the tour agency, he drove us to…

Humayun’s Tomb (tourist site),

and steered us AWAY from Chandhi Chowk, only to drop us at some mall where we ate at…

That was the extent of my seeing Delhi.

This brings me to R: How will she react when M tells her what we’ve done. Despite my principle: No man gets left behind or left out, the fact we’re taking this new tour will screw R because it doesn’t leave her with any option but …

1) to pay money in order to join us
OR
2) be left on her own to fend for herself!

M&D want to wait to tell R of our change when she meets up with us tomorrow in Jaipur! I tell them its totally uncool and fucks her even more. If we let her know tonight then if nothing else, she’s got a small window of time to scramble on the internet for backups. But M&D think they’re being smart in “avoiding conflict” & don’t see how woos-ing on these kind of choices create consequences for others to deal with. M takes for granted R is an experienced traveler and assumes R won’t mind oh… having the rug pulled out from under her in the middle of the India desert! And Dan whom we’ve not heard peep from all these months of research/planning our itinerary, has suddenly developed a voice to how we should deal with things on this trip. While I’ve only just met Regina, no one is being sensitive to the fact R is a “female traveling alone” and that makes her both reliant and vulnerable to OUR itinerary when she joins us. Totally un-cool.

I’m watching this and de-tatching from myself… too exhausted to fight. It’s like bird shit falling on you and someone trying to convince you that its lucky. But this is a red flag omen. This is my 2nd experience of Delhi.

Tomorrow we drive off to Jaipur where we will be staying for a night. Our driver, Kul will be meeting us at 6A so tonight I should get some rest.

Sunday, Sept 22: Delhi

Arrived in India! Safe. My HTC mobile WI-FI doesn’t work yet… not sure if its our location. WOW! This is like a dream and I can’t believe i’m here. India is “mind-blowing”, as they say in Bollywood films….

Air India.
It all started with my Air India flight. Women in saris & your own TV set monitor with a choice of Hollywood & 3-hr long Bollywood films (Om Shanti Om, Life in a Metro, Welcome, etc…)! 14 hrs went by pretty quickly b/c of this. They give you a small bag of earplugs, eye-blinds, socks? & breath-freshener. And 2 meals were served…of course,.. Indian meals!!! It was an experience of its own! What a way to travel to India.

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