Love Letter #14: When life forces you into the uncomfortable spaces of long-term travel

Train from Bangkok to Hat Yai border crossing (into Malaysia)

Dear Love,

You may be wondering what’s up with me these days.

Before I left Korea, I had planned 3 months in India…

My plan: to job search for summer work in Korea while in India.
One hitch: I never planned for the ‘what if‘ I never found a job by the end of my Indian summer!

This forced me into a uncomfortable crux of “What do I do next… and for how long?”

Real life doesn’t always operate around scripts, ideal timing, an abundance of choices and perfect situations. Just as an acting audition doesn’t always give you more than 5 minutes to memorize your read or a job may not always grant a second chance for a screw-up. 

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Sometimes, you only have the answer that presents itself to you at the moment of your asking.

Standing at the crossroads of Suvarnabhumi Airport in Bangkok, the trigger moment came for my answer…

Without a plan of action,…

• Do I turn back and go home (which is far far away and an expensive plane ticket)…

• Or pioneer onward?

The only sign greeter waiting for me outside the door of arrivals was “Onward”. Since, I’ve been trying my hand at impromptu– yes, unplanned–  long-term solo travel.

For a gal who’s never had to plan for anything longer than a three week vacation, a crash course in ‘winging it‘ long-term travel style, came with thrills but also an underlining of suppressed terror.  I didn’t gear myself with RTW bucket list ideas, ‘How to budget your long-term trip’ tips, nor had I imagined how I’d feel hobo-ing from guesthouse to guesthouse, living continually out of a backpack 24/7.

Vagabonding are for the truly adventurous and free-spirited sort. It’s something that bubble-safe travelers like me (with Master’s degrees), only read about in actual vagabond travel blogs or watch in movies.  People like me don’t do things like go drifter without a plan!

A RTW trip? Yes, I had considered it for the …future.

But an off-the-cuff  hopscotch game with countries for an indeterminate time (until I find a job) and limited funds?

Not yet… not now. And certainly not without preparation.

But sometimes life only presents you one answer.

It’s as if it’s cheer leading for you, but you don’t yet know why.

.

Nervously seeking but (hopefully) finding,

GRRRL